What am I, exactly? Guideline Questions I Can Ask Myself?

I am biologically female. I have thought about being male every single day for the past year and a half. I'm going on 17. The past two years for Halloween, I dressed up as men and I ped. When I heard somebody refer to me as "he," I got a lovely ,tickley, giddy feeling. I'm just not sure if being a guy is what I really want; I feel like it's a fool-proof way to be ostracized by people who only know me by what is in between my legs. Another facet of the confusion is my attraction to men. How can one have thoughts of identifying as the opposite gender while being attracted to the gender they want to become? Further, I have thoughts about being the more masculine one in a gay relationship with a man. Phrase of my day(s): WTF? Are there specific questions I could ask myself to be more clear on what I am (and if I want what I THINK I might want) as I continue to question whatever that may be? Any answers are welcome, unless they involve condemning me to the underworld for "unnatural thoughts." Thank you.